No Tomorrow


Rating: PG-13... nothing too bad.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, they all belong to the All Mighty Joss Whedon. I don't own the concept of the story, either.
Distribution: Yeah, sure... just ask first and tell me where it's going.
Author's Notes: This one is from Buffy's POV at the end of "Surprise." Please, people! Let me know what you think! And thank you to those who have given me feedback. It is greatly appreciated.


"Come on," Angel said. "We need to get inside."

We had just narrowly missed death at the hands of the Judge, Spike, Drusilla, and their minions. After seeing Big Blue, I wasn't sure how we were going to her out of this one. I remember that when I kicked him, I had felt a sudden fever. I didn't think I wanted know what would happen if he got his hands on me. And to top if all off, it had been raining hard when we had gotten away.

I followed Angel to his apartment, feeling cold from the rain outside. He opened the door and once we got there and turned on the light. I closed to door behind me as he took off his heavy coat. I put my arms around myself, realizing I was soaked to the skin in cold water and a sick Slayer was a soon to be dead Slayer.

"You're shaking like leaf," he told me.

"Cold," I managed to say.

"Let me get you something," he said as he brought her some of his clothes for her to wear. "Put these on. And get under the covers, just to get warm."

I took the clothes and made my way over to the bed so that I could change. I noticed he was still staring at me and I looked up at him pointedly. He seemed to remember himself and turned around to give me some privacy. "Sorry," he said.

I took off the top shirt, and I suddenly felt a pain on my back. Angel must have heard me inhale a sharp breath, because he asked: "What?"

I hurried to reassure him. "Oh, um, it's okay. I just have a cut or something."

"Can I..." he started. "Let me see."

I looked up at him and clutched the top shirt to my chest protectively. "Okay," I whispered.

Angel turned around and walked over to sit beside me on his bed. I turned my back so that he could examine the cut. I felt his hands gently touch my back, and I knew that some of my shivering was now from nervousness. I loved those hands. I still do, actually. They're so big and strong and rough, yet gentle and soft at the same time. And I loved the way he treated me like I was a glass vase that would break if he didn't handle it right.

"It's already closed. You're fine," he murmured, but he took the strap of the shirt I still had on and slowly lowered it down my shoulder.

I leaned back unto him and cuddled my face to his. I felt his arms wrap around me and I closed my eyes. "You almost went away today," I said, sounding like a little child.

"We both did," he replied.

The sob I was trying to hold back escaped. "Angel," I said with a sniffle. "I feel like I lost you. You're right, though. We can't be sure of anything."

"Shh... I..." he started. I noticed that he seemed to want to say the same thing he'd been about to when he were at the docks.

I turned to look at him. "You what?"

Finally, he broke down and said it. "I love you. I try not to but I can't stop."

It sounded like music to my ears. I'd wanted to hear those words for so long, and I was finally getting the chance.

"Me-- me, too. I can't either," I answered and I felt like an idiot. I wanted to tell him exactly what I was feeling but somehow, my mind didn't seem to be working right. I sounded like a scared child and that was the last thing I wanted to sound like in front of Angel, because compared to him, that's exactly what I was.

How could I tell him that he was one of the reasons I lived? That without him, my world would make no sense at all? I felt like even if I knew every language in the world, the words to express the fact that he was the light in my darkness didn't exist. The universe seemed like a small dot compared to the love I had and still have for him. So instead, I chose to put it all in a kiss. I wanted him to know what I was feeling exactly. I wanted to give him the key to my heart and let him throw it away so that no one else could have access. And he seemed to be feeling the same way, for he returned the kiss just as eagerly.

A few moments later, as the kiss started to get heavier, he broke away. I think he had felt me push him slightly back. "Buffy, maybe he shouldn't..." he said.

But I would have none of it. I put my hand to his lips to quiet him. "Don't," I whispered. "Just kiss me."

And he did. He kissed me like there was no tomorrow, and I think that maybe it was true. After what happened, there was no tomorrow for me. In fact, tomorrow didn't come until his soul was restored and he was safe with me.

To me, everything after the fateful night that we made love, was like a horrible nightmare that didn't end until my Angel came back to watch over me and comfort me.

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